welcome to my world.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Give up, give in... or give it everything you've got.

GIVING UP:

I've always wanted to make something out of my life...

and for the past 4 years i really thought... i was doing just that.

I started my first serious job at the age of 23 when i was fresh from school...

I was a part time musician and aspiring "Business Man"

I was given the opportunity to handle responsibilities that were way beyond me.

Being able to screw up and learn from it is truly priceless.

Travelled to faraway places for work, learning their different business and local cultures.

I wasn't getting a huge paycheck ... but cant say i was poorly compensated monetarily.

So why after 4 years, at the age of 26, do i feel like a confused drone?

I always felt incompetent in my work, i do my job, but nothing i ever do is good enough for my boss.

This made my life a living hell as i struggled for almost a year to be happy with what i did for a living. On the surface, i was supposed to be living the life.

In reality, i was frustrated, demoralized, obese and hating myself more each day.

I cant sleep well at night... I'm constantly stressed with no apparent reason.

I drag myself out of bed in the morning... and into the office, slump into a heap in my desk and proceed to dig my own grave.

I realize that a life in autoparts trading is not my niche no matter how hard i try.

There comes a time when no amount of money or benefits can justify my unhappiness. Thus I did the unthinkable.

I fucking gave up.

I resigned from my job this tuesday morning at 10.30am.

GIVING IN :

What do i feel now?

Scared Shitless.

why?

Simply because i actually had the chance to stick with my job, carefully make it all the way to a well-planned exit and hop right into a shiny new beginning, and i DIDNT.

I gave in to that voice in my head that seemed to defy all common sense.

I want to start afresh and I am going to do it my way.

I want to believe in myself again. Get those creative juices flowing.

Masochistic as it may seem,

i believe all life-changing decisions are fucking hard.

The tougher route may bring fresh perspective and deeper insight

- otherwise lost if i did this in the comfort of my safety bubble.

GIVING IT ALL:

In HK movie terms... Im doing the most climatic move in a Poker table scene. The Show Hand. *gasp*

Cool thing is Im not gambling. I know this is a losing hand on the poker table.

I am relinquishing all my chips, to leave my gambling lifestyle behind.

Things i hope to achieve in no particular order:

1) Weight loss. with a time lapse video no less for that emotional victory.

2) Become a better Photographer. Learn more and shoot more pictures.

3) Become a better Guitarist. Learn more and play more guitar.

4) Start my own business.

5) Be Happy.

I have accepted my boss's request to extend my 1 month notice to a 2.5 month notice so i can do a proper hand over to my "Replacement"

( So my job isn't as simple as he says huh?)

All the best to them.

Im done.

Min.

Monday, November 24, 2008

3 November Weekends... 3 very different weekends

Ok. So i crashed my car... my lovely reliable suzuki swift...

he always started energetically without complaints and stuck to the ground like a slipper.

Unfortunately a big puddle of water on the CTE disagreed with his existence and managed to slam it against the centre concrete divider (It spun another 720 Degrees and smashed into the opposite concrete divider)

After giving it much thought.

... about this much (Stretches both arms apart!!!)

I've decided to scrap it.

The repair cost was estimated to be $13,000 ...

Instead of claiming my insurance and destroying my 40% NCD and driving a car that - "Will-never-be-the-same-again"

I decided to lay it to rest so it may be reborn again.

"So the world can benefit from my devastating loss...."

I hope they can make useful things from it.

Like a bionic replacement arm for a little african girl ...

... or a Hoverboard (from "Back to the future" - im still waiting patiently for one of those.)

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Obama takes the cake. :)

I wonder if USA will ever have a Chinese President?
hmmm....

A friend shared a link with me... and a photographer has condensed the entire election into 4 photos.

This is Priceless....

Monday, October 27, 2008

Manila, Philippines

This time it was off to Manila.

Interesting place, for the first 3 hrs, after which it became excruciatingly boring.

Poverty was apparent and the traffic conditions are painfully bad.

Bangkok and Singapore have Nothing to complain about.

Thank you for checking out the pictures.

Prime waterfront housing.

1 Horse Power

Chrome is "IN" in Philipines

Local Transportation called "Jeepneys" (Modified WWII USA Military Jeeps with surplus old isuzu engines) Very inefficient, old diesel technology means pollution and poor fuel economy. Worse part is they only fetch around 20 ppl. They need Buses badly.

I guess i would like to post some pictures of my room view - whenever available.

Heres a series of pictures showing the view at different times of the day.

In Manila it gets bright earlier in the day and gets dark around 5pm ...

Everymorning i wake up and my first thought is "HOLY FUCK I OVERSLEPT" ... it looked like it was 1 pm outside... when its only 7 am...

8 AM

Around... 5 PM i think?

6.30 PM - it gets dark pretty quickly

1 AM

Thats it for Manila. For now.

Thanks for reading.

Monday, July 28, 2008

For the month of July... (Tehran - first Day)

Gave my dear driver/friend Ahmed a call to arrange airport transport.

Additional drama was provided when he didn't close his rear door properly and ejected some of our luggage on to the road at 50km/h... (excellent stuff Ahmed)